Under the influence

Isn’t it lovely when you see traits of your husband/wife in your children? A facial expression, a gesture, a way of speaking… It’s a good feeling to see what we’ve passed on to our children.

One thing The Husband has passed on to our son is not exactly endearing, but it’s certainly amusing: his reaction to anesthesia.

A few years ago The Husband decided to have sinopasty surgery (inserting a balloon into the sinuses – yuck) to deal with a lifetime of sinus misery. Fine. But in the pre-surgery testing it appeared his lymph nodes were very enlarged. A week of terror, with everyone assuming it was lymphatic cancer.

Okay, here’s where the story gets amusing (spoiler alert-it was NOT cancer, but rather something to do with his many and long-term sinus infections). He had to have a biopsy, which involved an incision at the base of his neck, in the front.

This was the first time he’d had any major surgery during our marriage, so I wasn’t sure what we’d be in for (though he had been a bit odd after a root canal once…). The post-op stage took TWO HOURS and I was beginning to get pretty concerned. Finally a nurse came to get me, and she looked terribly disturbed. “I need to warn you,” she said, “he’s behaving very strangely.”

That was an understatement. Before I managed to get him home, he had:
•insisted that the nurse had promised him a pizza, and insisted that he wasn’t leaving until he got it.
•had a party in the bathroom when he discovered he could put his hand under the automatic soap pump, pull it away quickly, and watch the soap splatter on the floor
•warned incoming patients as we loaded him into the car: “Don’t go in there – they’ll cut your head off! They tried to cut mine off, but they sewed it back on again.” (A reference to the odd placement of his incision.)

I found it all hilarious, though rather annoying because he wouldn’t cooperate with anyone. The nurses simply found it annoying and couldn’t get us out of there fast enough.

Footnote on this story: Got to go through this same thing two more times, when he finally had the sinoplasty and then a repair job on it.

The Boy has inherited his father’s bizarre reaction to anesthesia. We’ve gotten to witness it several times, due to his many oral surgeries. Singing at the top of his lungs is his noisiest behavior. Today he accompanied his singing with loud, non-stop talking. He gave an impromptu expository speech on the social habits of Canada geese, along with instructions on how to tell a male from a female. This was followed up by another speech abou some species of monkey that not only learned language, but also syntax. Gripping stuff.

Again, the nurses were not amused. Even though he warned them going in that he was likely to be silly afterwards, they were quite concerned that I would be upset by his raving. Again, I merely found it amusing. Honestly, he wasn’t THAT much different than he normally is without anesthesia.

Luckily, The Boy was pretty much himself again (though a lot quieter than normal) by the time I got him home yesterday.

So, all’s well that ends well. I’m just hoping we’re done with surgeries and anesthesia for the foreseeable future.

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5 thoughts on “Under the influence

  1. Glad they are okay. Silly ramblings are fun stories to tell later, but not so pleasant while they are happening. My husband had to have a deviated septum fixed. All he kept repeating was “it was cold in there, and they told me I looked like Robin Williams”. Which he does, just not so funny.

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  2. LOL! Too funny. It’s a shame that the staff is annoyed. Like Jenny said, I’d think that silly patients would be a fun part of the job.

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