DON’T PANIC

A brief run-down of the last 12 hours:

8:30 pm: Sat down to watch “Hitchiker’s Guide” with The Boy, who returned home Friday evening.

10:30: Went to bed, knowing I had to be up early for work – the last day of Sunday School until September, certain to be a morning of utter chaos.

11:28: Awakened by my phone making a VERY RUDE NOISE I had no idea it could make, and waking me up from a very deep sleep. Only to discover that the VERY RUDE NOISE was to alert me to a dangerous weather situation – flash flooding in our area. It may come as no surprise to you that flash flooding is not exactly a threat when you’re lying in your bed, sound asleep. Is there a way to set these emergency alerts so that they only alert me to weather situations I care about? I think the emergency alert people need to consult the Hitchiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, on which it is clearly printed “Don’t Panic.”

11:31: Stumbled into the bathroom for a pee. Literally stumbled, because darling daughter had left her drawer of the vanity pulled all the way out. I walked into it, hyperextended my knee, and spent three minutes practicing my profanity.

Awake, staring at the ceiling, and listening to heavy rain for over half an hour, when at…

12:13: Lightning strike in our neighborhood, which set off at least one car alarm.  The storm lasted several hours – including a couple more lightning strikes that set off car alarms – and I lay there listening to it for much of that time.

6:00: Awakened (again by my phone) to the opening strains of “California Girls.” And up for a long, sleep-deprived day.

I’ll be sure to take my towel. I think I’m going to need it.