Saturday snark.

I think I might be a mutant.

Consider the evidence.

  •  I’m perfectly thrilled that we’ve never been to Disney. Land or World. In my book, the in-your-face commercialism, crowds, and saccharine would be pure torture. (Hint, hint, Donald Trump – in case you’re still looking for something that’s “a hell of a lot worse” than water boarding. Asshat.)

  • A friend posted on FB yesterday that she was excited because she was about to start a 2-hour massage. Dear God in Heaven, TWO HOURS of a stranger all up in my personal space? I hyperventilate at the very thought.

  • I have never worn leggings as pants. Or worn any pants that have words plastered across the butt. Somehow the idea of inviting others to look more closely at my ass simply doesn’t appeal.

  • I don’t like wine. Or beer. Or any alcohol, much. Rarely a margarita or a Bailey’s on ice. It’s not a moral or ethical or even a health thing. Just don’t like it.

  • I don’t feel the need to stand up and place my hand over my heart while soulfully singing along to “God Bless the U.S.A.” every time it’s played at a sporting event. I do feel the need to hurl when others engage in this practice under the smarmy and mistaken impression that they’re great patriots.

  • I have a sneaking suspicion that Jesus doesn’t check Facebook to see whether I love him enough.

Here endeth the snark for today.


14 thoughts on “Saturday snark.

  1. Pingback: Sisterhood of the World Bloggers Tag – Bumbi's Mom

  2. Hahaha! From a UK perspective, I would never recommend wearing pants on the outside of anything. *ahem* but I have a particular aversion to those very thin black ones that go see through under any form of sunshine…

    Liked by 1 person

    • Oh, those are inexcusable! My worst story of those – I took my son to a scholarship competition, which required formal dress and individual performances. One girl signing in for the competition at the registration table had on sheer black hose as leggings, a top that only reached to her waist, and clearly no underwear. I don’t think my eyes have ever gotten so round. And her mother was right there with her and hadn’t forced her to put on actual clothing!

      Liked by 1 person

  3. The only time we have been to Disney – World in our case – was when the company my husband works for had a 25-year celebration. They had them every 5 years. All the managers and above were treated to all kinds of extravagant things at Disney World. They don’t have these celebrations any more, which I’m kind of sad. Anyway, Do pull on jeans count as pants? hahahaha. You and me? We’d make great neighbors. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • I suppose I MIGHT go to Disney if it were paid for…but then again I might my tickets away to someone who’d actually enjoy them. I would LOVE to have you as a neighbor! And yes, absolutely pull-on jeans count as pants. Wear them with pride!

      Liked by 1 person

    • Dammit, I just accidentally hit that magic combination of keys that made your question about the grocery store disappear when I was trying to answer it. Yes, it’s a Midwest chain, HyVee. I would seriously recommend checking out your local stores, though, to see if they offer this service. Ours isn’t well advertised – I had to hear about it from someone else who tried, it, and I don’t know how she discovered it!

      Liked by 1 person

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