Our Oldest, who’s had a really rough week, gave me a little gift via text this morning: FML. Which does not actually stand for “Fluff My Llama.”

I’m right there with her on FML this week. Actually, in terms of my workplace, it’s pretty much been a FML kind of year.

Very beginning of the year: entire staff screwed by pastor / governing board (which we call church council) in a very contentious situation that lasted over a month and was never fully resolved.

Spring, summer, fall: Close colleague and I kept guessing for literally 7 months about the viability and acceptance of an innovative plan we came up with, involving a job share that would, in real terms, be a promotion.

Christmas week: After being given the go-ahead to hire assistants for both our areas, colleague and I blindsided by pastor and council, who allowed us to believe we’d receive appropriate compensation for promotion / job share. No appropriate compensation was offered, and we’re now in the position of refusing to do the proposed work due to broken faith. And we discover that another colleague was cheated out of the health insurance she’d been promised. Betrayal right and left. And wondering what a change of career looks like at age 52.

Pile all this on top of family stress and the absolute destruction of our nation, and here I am, in an emotional fetal position,  trying to figure out how to keep going and how to enjoy the season.

So…I’m looking for things that might save my sanity. Here are a few:

This awesome birthday gift from The Boy. Not only does the book itself make me tear up, how great is it that my son knows me so well; knows how much I mourn the replacement of the best president of my lifetime with a despotic, dangerous, trashy person.

My family’s sense of humor. Back story: The Husband broke his finger last week, and it hurt too much for him to do the trash and recycling. Slyly, he came downstairs and said, “I’ve got a nice, crisp $1 bill for anyone who will do the trash tonight.” Middle and I laughed out loud, and next thing I knew she’d placed the dollar in this spot. I promptly took this photo and posted it on FB, with the caption, “Christmas has become so commercialized.”  Having forgotten that a rubber snake leftover from childhood and discovered in the back yard last summer has become a moving target in the nativity scene this year.  We crack us up.

Two of our three darlings are home, and the third gets here day after tomorrow. If having them all home together were my only gift, that would be all I needed.

Maybe I’ve found another meaning for FML: Family. Means. Love.


7 thoughts on “FML…

  1. I’m asking this sincerely and not snarkily: is your entire church dysfunctional, or just its current leadership? And if the latter, what kind of turnover does the leadership have? (I know some denominations change pastors every 4 years deliberately; in other places, church council has been the same handful of people swapping in and out since the Nixon administration.) I can certainly understand why you’d be contemplating career changes, after a year like this, especially if there’s no reason to expect improvement in the overall environment.

    Love the snake in the manger! There’s nothing quite like embedding running family jokes in holiday traditions. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • No worries, that’s a good question. Council turns over every couple of years, but the mindset never changes. Our pastor will probably never leave. Church wide structure is hands-off on that sort of thing. And most of the congregation, who have no idea what goes on behind the scenes, really adore him. And the rotten thing is that what we’re experiencing in these current situations is only the tip of the iceberg – he’s just an extremely difficult person to work with. Another aspect is that I adore all but one of my other co-workers, and care deeply about our church and the people in it. I’ve read that most people who leave a job give as their main motivation for leaving having a very unpleasant and difficult boss. So I guess I’m not alone in this situation.

      It’s good to hear from you. I hope you have a wonderful holiday with your son!



  2. So I had to go google what FML meant. So thanks for learning me something 🙂

    Sorry to read about all the disappointments this year brought you professionally. Glad to read that you can still see the good and find the bright spots in life. May 2017 bring more happiness.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you. Glad you enjoyed FML – I’m using it liberally! One thing this whole situation is doing for me is helping me speak out for myself and others, which is something that’s always been hard for me to do. Between all this crap and my anger over the election of a buffoon for our president, I’m really finding my voice.


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